The Haunted Hotel (Louisville, KY)
“May Tempest Tempt You”
By Noah Wullkotte: jollypumpkin@aol.com
The Haunted Hotel is an extreme haunt through and through. You’ll feel violated and dirty. The actors are up close and personal to say the least. You’ll be pushed, grabbed and even spanked. Yes, I said spanked. Tempest is Haunted Hotel’s resident dominatrix who shows up in the haunt multiple times. You’re encounter her outside and inside the haunt. She can be found in a bedroom where there’s been a unique fort made. She spanked me and paddled my ass after I exited the haunt. The Haunted Hotel is something else.
You better sign your name and answer the telephone or you’ll be subjected to torture. The Haunted Hotel has some of the best chainsaw maniacs we encounter at haunts. They don’t let up for a second and will rub their gas powered murder weapons across your skin. The actors are wild and crazy. A cannibal wants you to donate your flesh and blood as he makes sparks fly from his meat cleaver. The black mold in The Haunted Hotel has made the staff go mad. You better get on your hands and knees in the church or you’ll be torn apart by a large horned creature.
Everything is out to get you at The Haunted Hotel even the props. Barrels get inches from falling on you and the greenhouse is home to a plant monster that wants you for dinner. A massive boar head charges you as you narrowly escape. Don’t use the bathroom at The Haunted Hotel because the janitor will force you to lick his plunger in the feces infested bathroom. Yeah, I know how that sounded.
The Haunted Hotel is very interactive and it features one of the best Hellevators you’ll ever see. The actress was very intimidating as she lost her god forsaken mind. This is a creative haunt that features some rooms that you would see in an actual hotel. The wash room is home to human sized dolls that are creepy beyond belief. The Haunted Hotel does a good job utilizing fog and darkness. This is a very bizarre attraction. Where else can you have an actor splash water on your face or be grabbed by a sewer dweller?
Many of the actors are very intimidating because it’s no holds bared at The Haunted Hotel. One second you’re appreciating a prop and the next second you’re having your head twisted. You’ll check in, but you won’t check out at The Haunted Hotel. There are some areas that could be improved. The outside section pales in comparison to the inside, but it’s very intense none the less. There were a few scenes where we were unsure what we were looking at, but this isn’t the case with the majority of The Haunted Hotel. The Hellevator opened prematurely, but the actress inside did a great job terrifying us.
We were in and out in 19 minutes, but this depends on how long you interact with the various characters and how fast you walk or run. The Haunted Hotel uses timed ticketing, but you can also purchase tickets at the ticket booth. General admission varies depending on when you visit. It can be as little as $25 or as much as $35. A Fast Pass is $15 extra and Front of the Line Pass is $35. A Haunted Hotel and Malice Manor combo ticket is just $45. Please visit www.hauntedhotelky.com for pricing. There are concessions available such as hoodies, T-Shirts and more. The Haunted Hotel now has parking available across the street which is great or you can park your vehicle on a nearby street. Christmas Slashers is on Friday December 13th from 7PM-10PM and Curse of Krampus is on December 14th and 21st from 7PM-10PM.
We’ve been visiting The Haunted Hotel since 2002 and 2024 is their 34th year of terror. Every season they have something new in the way of high startle scares. This isn’t your run of the mill haunt since the actors can and will touch you. There’s vulgar language, it’s dark, gritty and one hell of a good time.
Length-9 Design-8 Props-8 Acting-9 Scare Effect-10
Final Stab: 8.8
www.hauntedhotelky.com