The Haunted Schoolhouse and Laboratory (Akron, OH)
“Its Haunted Halls Beckon You”
By Noah Wullkotte: jollypumpkin@aol.com
The Haunted Schoolhouse and Laboratory are two legendary haunts that have entertained millions over the years. Ohio is full of fun attractions during the Halloween season, but there’s nothing quite like The Haunted Schoolhouse and Laboratory.
The Haunted Schoolhouse opened its doors in 1974. President Nixon resigned that year, Barbra Streisand’s The Way We Were was the top song on the billboard charts and haunted houses were a relatively new concept. People were ready for a new form of entertainment and The Haunted Schoolhouse was ready to deliver. The Haunted Schoolhouse is much different from other attractions. Nearly every scene and prop has been built from the ground up.
The Haunted Schoolhouse takes you on a journey through scenes only a madman could dream up. It’s your worst nightmares come to life. Without any hesitation, I can say that Dracula’s Castle is one of the most breathtaking scenes you’ll see in any haunt. The amount of detail is inspiring and the lighting is beautiful. You have to see this room in person to really appreciate it.
The Haunted Schoolhouse is 3 stories of traditional scenes and startling concepts. The storm attic was introduced years ago and still impresses me to this day. There’s been a violent rain storm and a tree has come crashing down on a house. It’s fallen through the roof of an attic and there’s a creature hiding inside the tree.
You’re never safe at The Haunted Schoolhouse because rooms that appear normal aren’t quite what you think. A county cabin shifts back and forth and creatures of the night blend in with their surroundings throughout the haunt. They’re waiting to strike at any moment. A disgusting bathroom has been taken over by a playful skeleton who loves to torment people as they walk by.
There are too many eye catching scenes to mention. One of my favorites is the classroom with church pews and the headmaster. The Haunted Schoolhouse does a great job with its scenes. Who can forget the garage with the hearse hanging out of it? You might even meet a horror movie icon or two.
The Haunted Schoolhouse has you questioning your sanity as you enter a dungeon with a blood thirsty water monster who loves human flesh. There’s nowhere to run and there’s nowhere to hide as you try to escape the madness. You might even come face to face with a massive giant who’s ready to eat you. School is in session and you better not be late.
After you’re done surviving The Haunted Schoolhouse, you’re ready to enter The Haunted Laboratory. This 4 story haunt opened in 1981. At the time Ronald Regan was the president and the number one song for the year was Kim Carnes’ Bette Davis Eyes.
An old laboratory is home to one of the nation’s top haunted attractions. Many of the workers say that this place is haunted and you’re going to soon find out. The Haunted Laboratory features its own 3D scenes that are brought to life when you put on 3D glasses. Alien pods hang from scenes and creatures from another planet are ready to take you with them. Watch out for that ghoul who wants to drop some barrels on your head.
The Haunted Laboratory features the massive one and a half million volt Tesla Coil which is loud and very startling. It’s behind a cage and it’s quite intimidating. The other one can be seen on top of the laboratory’s roof when the weather is just right. As you walk past the vertical wind tunnel, look down and you can see the outside of the vortex tunnel. The Haunted Laboratory has one of the best vortex tunnels. It plays the Twilight Zone theme as it spins around and around.
Some workers say that they’ve witnessed a rocking chair move by itself in the library scene. This is definitely a creepy haunt. The morgue features real equipment that came from an actual morgue. The Haunted Laboratory is a much different experience compared to The Haunted Schoolhouse. But you have to experience both for a night of haunting entertainment. The Haunted Laboratory is around 16 minutes long and The Haunted Schoolhouse is just shy of 20 minutes. We have very few complaints about each haunt.
We only have a few minor complaints. We wish there were more actors that wore makeup instead of masks. The masks are some of the best we’ve seen though. We would also like there to be more characters that use memorable dialogue instead of yelling or growling. We do like the 3D section in The Haunted Laboratory, but we feel that there’s not enough going on. It could be more action packed and have better scenes.
Tickets are $13 per attraction on Thursdays and Sundays. On Fridays and Saturdays it’s $17 per attraction. The combo ticket is $22 on Thursdays and Sundays. On Fridays and Saturdays, it’s $26. VIP tickets are $20 per attraction. There are plenty of concessions available such as food, refreshments, Midnight Syndicate CDs, T-Shirts and more. The new T-Shirts glow in the dark which I thought was pretty clever. Be sure to get your picture taken at the photo-op station. Please visit www.hshlab.com for information on ticket prices and the Blackout event. Experience The Haunted Schoolhouse and Laboratory with the lights turned off.
The Haunted Schoolhouse and Laboratory are haunts that have gained legendary status over the years and for good reason. There’s really nothing like it in the United States. You’ll come face to face with crazy clowns, horror movie villains, monsters and just about any frightening creature you can imagine. You’re going to have a new definition of fear after you’re done surviving these classic haunts.
Final Stab For Each Haunt
The Haunted Schoolhouse: Length-9 Design-10 Props/Animatronics-10 Acting-8 Scare Effect-9 Final Stab: 9.2
The Haunted Laboratory: Length-8 Design-9 Props/Animatronics-10 Acting-9 Scare Effect-9 Final Stab: 9.0
www.hshlab.com