Mt. Healthy Haunted Hall (Cincinnati, OH)
“Have Your Life Insurance Ready”
By Noah Wullkotte: jollypumpkin@aol.com
We could see kids dressed up as far as the eye can see. There were witches, fairies and warlocks. It was Lights Up Night at Mt. Healthy Haunted Hall and we were ready to get the living daylights scared out of us. It was packed. People of all ages were lined up waiting to enter Mt. Healthy General Hospital. In order to make it to the entrance they would need to cross paths with some creepy characters. A monster with razor sharp teeth and a scarecrow could be seeing tormenting the crowd. These menacing monsters were on stilts and towered over everyone.
The queue line is decorated with a graveyard and a truck was off to the side with skeletons inside. We waited some time before it was our turn. We could smell the popcorn popping. A skeleton in a wheel chair and a grim reaper with a lantern are attached to the building. The group of girls in front of us were terrified and had to decide who would be in the front. The bloody receptionist checked us in and yelled “Two new patients!”.
Every season Mt. Healthy Haunted Hall has a brand new theme and this year it’s modeled after a haunted hospital of sorts. Please have your health insurance and life insurance ready. A corpse is torn apart with its head in a jar. Enter an elevator that goes to the 13th floor. The psychopath in a straight jacket was very welcoming. Dracula runs the local blood bank and his supplies are getting low. Would you like to donate some of yours?
A live surgery is underway in the operating room. Viewers watch in horror as the doctor stabs a poor patient to death and then sticks a needle in him. Your prescription is ready, but you’re not going to want these drugs from a crazy pharmacist. The baby ward is full of dead babies and their body parts. Watch out because you’re next. This is just a small taste of what Mt. Healthy Haunted Hall has the way of hospital themed scenes. They even have their own Mash (Mobile Army Surgical Hospital ) unit.
A horn goes off as a chest opens up revealing a small dinosaur head and a skull. But there are many rooms that don’t focus on the hospital theme. There’s a jail/shock therapy room featuring an animated electric chair. Sit down and kiss your sweet ass goodbye as you fry like a french fry. You’ll meet a witch who wants to place you in her cauldron. Satan rules the roost in the Crematorium. Get in and get toasty. The graveyard can be a spooky place at night. Don’t let the zombies get you. There are plenty of ghouls outside. They wear interesting masks. My favorite was the plague doctor. There’s a wide variety of scenes at Mt. Healthy Haunted Hall.
Unfortunately quite a few of the characters are really young. They’re great as victims, but aren’t so great playing a villain or monster. The older they are, the more effective they are. Standouts include Dracula, the Pharmacist, the witch and others. Bug Boy can be found near the Boo Boo Bus. He’s had a little too much to drink and begins to stumble.
Mt. Healthy Haunted has its own fair share of homemade props. Their vortex tunnel is very wide and their electric chair simulator is great. After you’re done with the haunt, you’ll enter their dark maze. There aren’t any monsters or scenes because it’s just plain pitch black darkness. We were in and out of the maze in 2 minutes, but that’s because we visit the haunt every year. If you don’t know the trick to escaping then you could be in there for a while. Mt. Healthy Haunted Hall is a good haunt for families since it’s not overly gory and the characters are more creepy than scary.
Total tour time was 12 minutes, but could be longer if you get lost in the dark maze. General admission is $12 per person and a $2 discount is applied with a canned good donation. Fast Passes to skip the regular line are $18 and there are no discounts. It’s cash only and there is no ATM on site. Bring in two cans of soup on any Sunday (Soupy Sundays) to get $6 off your ticket. Other canned goods still get up to a $2 discount. Lights up night is on October 20th from 6pm to 6:45pm. The little ones get to go trick or treating through the a less intense version of Mt. Healthy Haunted Hall as well as getting a trip through their giant vortex tunnel! Cost is $5 per child and adults are free.
Mt. Healthy Haunted Hall has a variety of treats including popcorn, candy, chips, soda, hot chocolate and water. The most expensive item is popcorn at $2 a bag. Don’t forget to take your picture in front of the photo op area which has a large banner featuring haunt characters. The Mt. Healthy Haunted Hall is sponsored by the Madonna Council Knights of Columbus and assisted by youth organizations. It benefits these groups and other charities. Canned Goods are donated to the Mt. Healthy Food Alliance. Mt. Healthy Haunted Hall has been scaring friends and families for 34 years. It’s a new theme every year and something we look forward to. You can’t beat the price on Soupy Sundays and let Mt. Healthy Haunted Hall scare the yell out of you! Will you survive the chainsaw maniac?
Length-7 Design-7 Acting-7 Props-7 Scare Effect-7
Final Stab: 7.0
www.hauntedhallinfo.com