Dead Acres/Haunted Hoochie (Pataskala, OH)
“Pure Entertainment For Your Sick and Twisted Pleasure”
By Noah Wullkotte: Jollypumpkin@aol.com
Haunted Hoochie is one of the world’s most controversial haunts. People come far and wide to experience its unique brand of extreme scares. It truly has a cult following and some of the largest lines of any haunt you’ll tour. Flames can be seen on top of silos as a demon guards the haunt.
Haunted Hoochie is a sensory overload taken to the next level. It’s a horror movie that develops right in front of your eyes. Watch a lunatic stick a shotgun in his mouth and then pull the trigger. Blood runs down the wall behind him as the crowd cheers for more. Haunted Hoochie is well known for its horrific scenes that are grotesque in nature and quite original.
Some haunts have tried to replicate these scenes, but Haunted Hoochie does them best. They’re the innovators of these graphic skits and they’re a big part of what makes Haunted Hoochie so badass. No subject matter is off limits. One scene features a mad doctor who hits the stomach of a pregnant woman with a sledgehammer to help free a demon baby. Watch the baby go air born as the crowd reacts in horror. The cursed church is full of scantily clad nuns with their breasts hanging out and there’s an evil priest with a handful of snakes. A pentagram bursts into flames as all hell breaks loose.
This is a highly detailed haunt with high startle props everywhere you turn. Some serious money has been invested into this place. I was amazed by the amount of animatronics in some of the rooms. You’ll see a Headless Horseman, 13 foot Impaler Monster, a roaring T-Rex, killer spiders and so much more. No corner is cut when it comes to scenes.
The realistic war zone will have you dodging gunfire and there’s even a helicopter with moving propeller blades. Bullets hit the water as you run for safety. The junkyard is home to some crazed killers and a runaway motorcycle that comes after you. Haunted Hoochie is full of actors that aren’t afraid to touch customers. If you’re afraid of chainsaws then Haunted Hoochie will make you run in terror. Numerous times I had chainsaws rubbed up against my legs and back. It’s a little unnerving, but it adds to the experience.
You will get touched and you’ll be up close and personal as you witness live murder scenes. I felt like I was part of some sick snuff film. I’m not a huge fan of clowns and I was excited to see one get his head chopped off. A poor woman has her mouth cut into with a grinder and there’s much more bloodshed you’ll experience. Who doesn’t like a little death by chainsaw? If you’re a fan of gore then you’re in for a real treat at Haunted Hoochie.
This is a fast paced haunt where at times you’ll be walking pretty quickly as you dodge actors and animatronics. One of the most hectic areas is the prison break scene full of crazy criminals. Haunted Hoochie is pure pandemonium. Anything can happen. Will you survive the madness that is Haunted Hoochie?
We were in and out of the haunt in 20 minutes and there wasn’t a moment where we weren’t entertained. After you’re done, you can enter Bad Trip in 3D. I like to refer to this haunt as “The calm after the storm”. It’s basically a maze with bizarre props and 3D effects. You’re not going to come in contact with many actors and there aren’t many scenes to speak of. You’ll experience a man eating Venus Fly Trap, massive flying bumble bees, mutant clowns, a vortex tunnel, and so many different eye catching props. This is a fun attraction where you’ll feel like you’re on some bad acid trip. Bad Trip in 3D has not be scored since it’s more of a maze than an actual haunt. Total tour time is about 6 minutes.
Tickets are $25 and this includes admission to Haunted Hoochie and Bad Trip in 3D. VIP Fast Pass Tickets are available for $45. Parking is $3 per vehicle. Arrive early unless you plan on purchasing a VIP Fast Pass. Lines can be massive at times and you’ll be waiting hours to experience Haunted Hoochie. There are concessions available such as beanies, hoodies, snacks, refreshments and more. You can purchase Haunted Hoochie apparel online at www.deadacres.com.
There’s no doubt that Haunted Hoochie is one of the best haunts in the United States. It’s a sensory overload like no other. Plan a trip to Pataskala, Ohio for one of the most extreme haunts around and GIVE ME A HELL YEAH!
Length-9 Design-9 Props/Animatronics-10 Acting-9 Scare Effect-10
Final Stab: 9.4