Malice Manor (Clarksville, IN)
“Lord Rancor’s Curse”
By Noah Wullkotte: jollypumpkin@aol.com
Lightning and thunder strikes as evil lurks in the darkness. Lord Rancor welcomes you to his manor and will his curse consume you? Violators will be shot. Survivors will be shot again. This is City Blood’s 2022 review of Malice Manor in Clarksville, IN.
Malice Manor does a great job entertaining customers. If you’re not scared then you’ll be laughing your ass off. A hallway is decorated with butts that blow air as you walk past them. Yes, you heard me right. There’s a hallway decorated with butts that blow air. Do I need to repeat that again? A car falls on a mechanic as he yells for help. This isn’t a haunt that takes itself too seriously and we love that about them.
Malice Manor is quite creative and interactive. It’s your decision whether to enter the laundry room or not. If you enter, you’ll be drowning in bubbles. The bar tender sprays water on you as you enter. Even the props will attack. A large shark will take a bite out of you if you’re not too careful.
The actors are intense and don’t use your typical lines such as “Get Out” or “Where are you going?” When we exited the haunt, we were confronted by a chainsaw maniac who wanted to know where his fucking 10mm socket was and asked us to empty our pockets. We were definitely caught off guard by this and it made us laugh hysterically. This kind of humor is what makes Malice Manor so different.
While inside, an actor sniffed me from head to toe and said that I smelled like verman. This is a fantastically fun haunt. A playroom has a young girl who used to be a doll and wants to make you into her best friend. Other scenes include the Cadaver Tavern, a garden with a skull fountain, a bloody bathroom, a garage, a pirate ship section and much more.
Portions of Malice Manor are dark and the hallways can be tight and confining. So, if you’re claustrophobic then you’re in for a real treat. Expect the unexpected at Malice Manor. Walk onto a bridge as it starts to vibrate. A portrait magically comes alive. You might think that there’s nowhere to go when suddenly you’re forced to get on your hands and knees to exit a room through the fireplace. Malice Manor features a lot of different themed rooms and this makes the haunt very unpredictable.
General admission is $25, a Fast Pass is $40 and Front of the Line Admission is $60. It was packed the night we visited and there were only 4 people in the Fast Pass Line. We highly recommend the Fast Pass. The closer it gets to Halloween the more crowded it gets and for just fifteen extra dollars you won’t have to wait for an hour or more in line. It’s a no-brainer. Total tour time was Around 17 minutes, but this is always dependent on how fast you walk or run. Your interaction with the various characters also affects the tour time. There are concessions available such as snacks, soda, hats, beanies and more. Before entering the haunt, you’ll have your group photo taken. I picked a machete as my weapon of choice for the photograph. Group photo prices vary and you can pick them up on the outside of the haunt. Christmas Chaos takes place on December 9th and 10th from 7pm-10pm.
Malice Manor is plain old fun. You’ll be laughing, screaming and just enjoying yourself to the bitter end. I still can’t get over the hallway full of asses. We highly recommend that you make a trip out to Clarksville, Indiana for an entertaining journey into fear. Lord Rancor is waiting.
Length-8 Design-8 Props-8 Acting-9 Scare Effect-8
Final Stab: 8.2
www.malicemanorhauntedhouse.com